Raging Sharks

Corin Nemec, Vanessa Angel (2005) White sharks terrorize underwater researchers and a group of divers in the Pacific Ocean

Um, wat? I'm confused. The opening scene of this movie involves a space station and aliens. I really don't know what this has to do with sharks... OK, so apparently the space station exploded (in orbit around some other planet) and some sort of capsule ended up entering the Earth's atmosphere, and hitting some sort of Russian freighter thing, blowing it up. Hopefully this will be explained at some point in the future.

Oh, and by the way, this film marks Jonas Quinn's glorious return to my blog. He of Mansquito and "Supersoldiers of the SS or whatever" fame. And maybe a few other things. Oh, and fellow Stargate-alum Vanessa Angel is apprently in this as well. You might remember her as Anise/Freya, the ever so annoying Tok'ra character who was always being annoying, while wearing relatively skimpy outfits. Well, relatively skimpy in comparison to most of the other stuff on the show. Except for maybe the pilot, but that's a different story.

And Jonas apparently is in his Stupid Hair phase. He looks kind of ridiculous when he doesn't have the short hair from his original run on SG1 (not counting that episode where he came back with really dumb hair. Actually, upon further review, his hair longer than the Stupid Hair phase, so it doesn't look as bad. Still longer than I was expecting. And he's also got some sort of weird beard/stubble thing going on. Not that I can really complain about that...

And now Shaun Spencer's father has now upgraded from being a fake psychic detective's father to the captain of a US Navy nuclear submarine.

OK. So apparently, there's a deep-sea research station somewhere deep in the ocean. And a sea-plane is skimming close to the water trying to detect something or another over this facility. And yet, in the wide shot we can see land behind the plane... and pretty sizeable land. i.e. something larger than a Caribbean island. (I probably forgot to mention that this whole thing was taking place in the Bermuda Triangle) Land that is probably the size of, oh, say, Vancouver?

And apparently neoprene wetsuits are completely immune to the pressure wave caused by the detonation of 2 torpedoes. Even though it knocks the hell out of the underwater research station. And sharks are made up entirely of ribs. Or at least when they are en-bits-inated by explosions they turn into long skinny pieces that look like ribs. The bones, not the meat covered variety.

And you should probably think twice about trying to escape in a mini-sub and leaving all your friends behind, if you ever get into this sort of situation. Because you'll probably get attacked by sharks, and then your sub will crash and blow up. With a ridiculous amount of explosive force.

New question: if you were dissolving some sort of unidentified chemical and causing it to bubble and froth and stuff, wouldn't you want to use a fume hood of some variety? Because this guy didn't seem fazed by it...

And as far as I know MJ-12 =/= DIA. The bad guy just revealed himself saying that he's MJ-12. And then Jonas informed everyone that he was DIA. Which, as far as I know isn't the case. (And strangely enough, there's a character in this movie named Jonas, while the guy I'm referring to as Jonas is actually named Mike. But Movie Jonas is dead now, so I don't need to make this differentiation anymore)

And Jonas sure does like to yell.

In other news, why isn't Firefox taking note of my spelling errors any more? Its kind of annoying.

Oh, and apparently 9mm vs. computer consoles results in large explosions...

And now Captain MJ-DIA just cocked his MP5 thinkg on the side. Nowhere near the MP5's cocking handle just behind the front sight. I think all H&Ks have their cocking mechanisms in the same place... And even though it wasn't fired, Jonas cocked it twice for no reason. And I just did some quick research, and found that none of the MP5 variants had a cocking handle on the side....

And it looks like Jonas and Anise were just Deus Ex Machinaed by a couple of aliens... I could have kept you updated on the whole alien subplot that was going on, but didn't. At least aliens are the only explanation that would enable everyone to be able to survive being on the research station when it exploded. Or maybe it was just those magic neoprene wetsuits again. Corbin Bernsen is as skeptical as I am...