Riddles of the Sphinx

Dina Meyer, Lochlyn Munro (2008) A man and his daughter must solve a series of riddles to defeat a deadly creature.

Sci-Fi Saturday movie from 9/27. Here goes.

Donnelly Rhodes! Doc Cottle is so dang awesome. Hopefully his character in this movie is as crotchety as Doc Cottle on Battlestar Galactica. So far, not as crotchety. Seems too happy and cheerful. And just a little to eaten by the sphinx to be properly crotchety. Dang. I was really hoping that he'd stick around...

Teacher's Advice: "Make good choices". Well thanks teacher man. Never would have thought of that myself.

So instead of Doc Cottle gone wrong, it seems we have Daniel Jackson Gone Wrong. A very wienerific attempt at making someone as awesome as Daniel Jackson. Not enough awesomeness. Or Sarcasm. Or Non-Wienerificness. I was really hoping that someone with the name "Lochlyn Munro" would be awesome. But he's not.

"He's got it easy Jess. He's dead!". Very compasionate DJGW. Way to talk about your dead father.

And the Sphinx's new power: turn into a really freaking ugly dude. In a loin-cloth. OK, lady. you just punched him in the business, and you think throwing plates at him is gonna work?

There's an inter-dimensional portal underneath the Sphinx in Giza, Egypt. FYI. Something about the Chamber of Knowledge or something.

I thought the whole point of the Sphinx was that he/she/it gave you a riddle to answer, rather than just kicking your ass. This sphinx seems to have neglected that part.

And apparently DJGW's daughter is impressed by standard driving skills. The driver didn't seem to do anything particularly interesting. And apparently walking down stairs is dramatic. And a good way to make an entrance...

In case you were wondering what template of movie this is, its the one where the guy leaves whatever secret organization thing prior to the movie, but when the events of the movie happens, they realize that he's the best man for the job, and are forced to bring him back in, despite all of their misgivings. And the one where the female main character/potential love interest wears a combat leotard.

Thank goodness he talks to himself as he deciphers things. Otherwise we'd have little to no idea what's going on. Not that we do right now...

Oh sweet. Now there's a traitor in the ranks. Who didn't tell Doc Cottle about the beast that eventually ate him.

And thankfully DJGW's 16 year old daughter can figure out riddles on her PSP. Do those even connect to the internet, or any sort of thng where they could access pictures of Greek statues?

And apparently Greece looks strangely like the area surrounding Vancouver. And DJGW is now wearing a leather jacket, something that resembles a fedora, and a man-satchel. How very original. And he still can't act.

And Baldy McTootherson just used a "gravity gun" against the sphinx after our heroes showed up again. Not previously when his doods were getting et...

And apparently they only had 2 HMMWVs in their budget, and could only afford 2 additional jeeps in a very orange-ish camoflage scheme. And one of the hummers is one of the pickup truck types... so I'd hate to be the guy on the .50 riding that... And once again Baldy has let his underlings die, while only managing to save the heroes. So, basically they're not really making it seem like the main characters are in any sort of jeopardy.

and now his strategy for getting the last clue is to get nekkid. apparently there should be no barrier between the human body and the elements in order to pass the trap. But he got himself nekkid, rather than convincing his female compatriots to do so. Worst Sci-Fi movie ever.

And of course the traitor is Baldy. Which would explain his crappiness in saving his dudes.

And again, I am struck by how awesome it would be to fight a CG monster. And how cool it would be to get a pair of chrome-ass 1911s and put pearl grips on them...

And apparently dude had to kill himself in order to kill the sphinx. or something. Dude just killed himself, and now he's wondering if he's dead.

And he just passed up the knowledge of the universe to be with his kid and combat leotard woman.

Honestly, I had hopes for this one. I thought it could be interesting. Boy was I wrong.

And today's pictures: DJGW, Baldy immediately post inevitable betrayal, Baldy slightly later, and Ugly Dude/Sphinx. In no particular order, because as we all know, I have no real idea how to work pictures in this thing.