Monday, October 13, 2008

Vipers

Jonathan Scarfe, Claire Rankin (2008) Genetically enhanced snakes escape from a reserach lab and terrorize townspeople.

Sci-Fi Saturday movie from 9/21... still catching up...

I'll be finishing listening to the Falconer album during commercial breaks, so you might see some additional comments from that... As it stands they have 3 songs on the album sung in Swedish... yay!

Sweet. Its got Don S. Davis in it. Got to love some General Hammond. RIP that guy.

And a couple of other names I think I recognize from Stargate...

And it starts off with some guy trying to steal some snakes from a research facility. But it ends up going horribly wrong, and the snakes get released...

And its got Corbin Bernsen in it. AKA Shawn's dad from Psych.

And Tara Reid. Wasn't she famous once? now she's just doing all sorts of bad sci-fi shit...

And now a couple's making out in their car... and I'm pretty sure that as she was taking her top off, there was some sort of microphone cable on her shirt that they covered up very poorly... and the movie is only about 20 minutes old, and they've already got people getting nekkid... and eaten by snakes...

And there's some sort of domestic squabble that I can't be arsed to care about... something about growing pot... and being a bitch...

And the dude who tried to steal the snakes is Corbin Bernsen's chief of security. And is now in charge of the recovery of the snakes from the random town where the movie is taking place. Oh no...

And I need to buy the new Indiana Jones movie. Still haven't seen it, but I probably should at some point... Just to complete the collection, if for no other reason.

Fish Head! Apparently some dude just caught a fish head while fishing...

And now some more boning... Which didn't get interrupted by snakes. Frankly I'm surprised... looks like its in fact some post-boning snake attacks... the dude has survived, since he's in the shower, but the chick just ate it...

And new guy main character was in the military with Tara Reid's ex-boyfriend... so they're probably gonna bone later... and apparently you can easily pick a lock with a scalpel... or something from a med-kit...

Dude just threw a knife and pinned a snake's head against the door... that's pretty damn impressive...

Based on the amount of screaming that happened during the time I was getting myself something to drink, I just missed a lot of people getting et...

and now everyone's in some sort of ice-cream truck... and the sherrif apparently bought the farm during my absence... and main character dude just got bit... but luckily this isn't a zombie movie, or he'd be fucked... and its far to early for that... but luckily his knee brace saved him...

and apparently their battle strategy is that snakes don't like the cold, because Tara Reid saw it on Animal Planet. That just inspires the greatest amount of confidence ever...

They just mentioned Pink Floyd's the Final Cut. I'm surprised... Figured they'd have chosen something more mainstream... like Dark Side of the Moon or The Wall... Now we'll see if they actually play the song later. If they do, I'm guessing it'll be in the final scene... but i'm thinking they probably won't as that involves paying for the rights to use it...

and now there was a scuffle, and some guy just got shot... somehow that always happens...

And if I ever refer to someone named Megan as "Megs", please feel free to punch me in the face...

And for the record, this is one of those "Evil Corporation" movies. All this is because of the evil corporation, and the guy from the evil corporation who seems to be trying to steal the snakes, which have been used for cancer-cure research, and use them for some nefarious purpose...

And apparently this was one of Don S. Davis' last roles before he died.

And they've take Evil Corporation Dude along with them on their "lure the snakes away" strategy... this can only end poorly... and for whatever reason, main character dud is walking behind the truck, rather than riding on it... he's probably gonna regret that later...

and thus dieth Evil Corporation Henchman...

and now they're making an IED. Which is what killed Main Character Dude's Friend/Tara Reid's ex-boyfreind...

and now Evil Corporation Dude just got bit... and is dying a lot quicker than the little kid at the beginning.

Evil Corporation Dude: Less Resilient Than A Small Child!

And apparently Corbin Bernsen has inherited the title of Evil Corporation Dude...

and dude just shot a hole in the greenhouse while trying to shoot at a snake... so they've lost their containment...

but luckily they were ready with "Operation Blow Everything Up". and executed it well... and somehow the guy managed to get far enough away from the explosion in a few seconds of running...

And now they're replaying a conversation that Corbin Bernsen had. In a news conference... looks like he's screwed... Finally, the evil corporation has gotten its just desserts... and not the tasty kind...

And someone left one of snakes in Corbin Bernsen's limo. And he got bit in the crotch... well, they didn't actually show where he got bit, but they showed him from just above the waist and up, but not where he got bit. so I can only assume...

1 comment:

Su said...

Are you sure it wasn't in the toe?