Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Silent Warnings

Today's blog post/movie review/thing is brought to you by Arithmetic!

Some Simple Bad Sci-Fi math, from Silent Warnings:

Or maybe just statistics...

# of Main Characters: 6
# of Main Characters that I don't care about: 6
# of scenes with crickets and stuff as back-ground noise that is supposed to be adding to the ambience, but is instead really freaking annoying: Too damn many

and now for the important statistics (what all bad sci-fi seems to be about):

# of Female Main Characters: 3
# of Female Main Characters who incessantly wear shirts that expose their midriffs: 3
# of Female Main Characters who incessantly wear shirts that expose their midriffs, with exposed thongs: 1
# of Female Main Characters who have been shown on screen in only their underwear: 2

and the piece de resistance (or whatever sort of frenchy crap you feel like using):
Stephen Baldwin = really annoying and a rather crappy actor.

Only about halfway through the movie... I might edit this post when I'm done... and true enough, I've done so.

3 comments:

Su said...

I had something that I wanted to impart to you earlier, but you didn't have up a new post and I forgot. OH! I remember.

Dancing Bear and Tiny-Ass Bear (who shall henceforth be known as Ryu) are on my desk here. Just though you should know. Snowball is on the bed.

Dan said...

Who the hell is Tiny-Ass Bear?

Anonymous said...

People should read this.