Well, it has come to my attention that Trevor actually seems to watch the same filth that I do.
So, consequently he has vaulted over Rob as my second favorite reader. And he hasn't even posted yet. (See what constantly insulting my blog gets you?)
Anyways, sadly, Trevor, you will never amass the same amount of commas in one sentence, unless you really try...
What I was actually gonna say before I went on that comma tangent was that you're rather unlikely to unseat Su as my favorite reader, simply because she has boobs.... and you're a dude...
Sorry.
FYI, the "science" was to figure out how long I could make a title before Blogger would kindly ask me to cease and desist.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Oh yeah.
Well, I also watched the latest episode of Eureka.
Which by the way is a fantastic show, which I honestly have no clue if I've written about, but I'll probably get to when I have the laptop...
Anyways, if you don't want to be spoiled for last night's episode (e.g. my brother, who might or might not be my alter ego in a fat suit), look away now.
Poor Stark. I really hope they find some way of bringing him back. Especially earlier this season, he had some great interactions with Carter. He probably was equally awesome in the earlier 2 seasons, but as I've watched the current season, I've just noticed more and more how awesome his character is.
Rather a shame...
But as the producers of Stargate SG1 and Atlantis are fond of saying: No one really dies in Sci-Fi.
Lets hope that the writers of Eureka follow the same logic.
Which by the way is a fantastic show, which I honestly have no clue if I've written about, but I'll probably get to when I have the laptop...
Anyways, if you don't want to be spoiled for last night's episode (e.g. my brother, who might or might not be my alter ego in a fat suit), look away now.
Poor Stark. I really hope they find some way of bringing him back. Especially earlier this season, he had some great interactions with Carter. He probably was equally awesome in the earlier 2 seasons, but as I've watched the current season, I've just noticed more and more how awesome his character is.
Rather a shame...
But as the producers of Stargate SG1 and Atlantis are fond of saying: No one really dies in Sci-Fi.
Lets hope that the writers of Eureka follow the same logic.
Some Random Ass Sci-Fi movie that I don't even remember the title of, and it doesn't really matter, and yeah...
Well, I watched some movie that I taped off the sci-fi channel... well actually DVRed, but that's essentially the same thing.
Granted, I only finished watching it about an hour ago, but I've already largely forgotten what went on.
Apparently some alien race showed up and demanded that the world sacrifice 8 million people for some strange reason... something about a disease, that somehow, inexplicably, human "essence" or some shit was the cure... so the main character's daughter gets chosen to be sacrificed by some twisted lottery... (I wonder if people had to buy tickets... cause that would both suck terribly, and be rather hilarious... "look ma! I won... and my prize is... oh damn...")
Anyways, stupidity, and really crappy looking weapons ensue... and so does Carl Weathers, sadly not promoting Burger King, or other fine dining establishments where one is capable of getting free refills on one's drinks...
So, seriously, I was having the damndest time trying to figure out what the weapons they were using were. Looked like AKs with some crazy ass stock, and an M4 carry handle. And a weird barrel/flash-hider... and the aliens used scraps of plexiglass...
Anyways, the good guys use some technology they reverse engineered from the Roswell crash (which naturally are the same aliens as are currently oppressing the world), and blow up some satelite/space station thing, which they just randomly started referring to when they were about to blow it up, and I don't remember them referencing before, so, until they actually blew it up, I hadn't the foggiest clue what they were actually trying to blow up...
I think it was Alien Siege... or something...
Unless that was the one with Bruce Campbell as the doctor guy who ends up saving the world by, well, being Bruce Campbell. Or that might have been Alien Apocalypse... I don't even freaking know anymore... all these shitty Sci-Fi movies blend together into one horrendous amalgamation of stupidity, shit, and.... uh... shit. But they're glorious in that respect.
I also watched Mask of Zorro a while back... or it might be called something else... its the one where Anthony Hopkins is inexplicably hairy and Mexican... and Zorro. Basically, I only watched it because it had Bra'tac in it. And as we all know Bra'tac is awesome... and really hard to type because the apostrophe key is dangerously close to the return key.
Anyways, I've just discovered that I like making new paragraphs for things... I seem to do that alot... whatever...
Anyways some more, I discovered why Zorro is cool. Because he's always so happy when he's stabbificating people... he seems to find great joy in prancing around and stabbing random goons. Whatever floats his boat...
Best line: Original Zorro: "Do you even know how to use that?" (referencing a sword)
Zorro in Training: "Yeah, the pointy end goes into the other guy." *weird face*
And earlier, I discovered why I like Batman. I realize that I have already told this theory to my sole reader, but hey, whatever, now it'll be in print.
He hits people. With people.
Sheer brilliance.
And while I was laying on the couch earlier, I have decided what my autobiography (or biography if I'm too damn lazy to write it) will be called:
"I'm Not Wearing Any Pants: The Al Gore Story"
Behold the power of a little bit of bad sci-fi, a decent amount of GRE studying, and a lot bit of crazy...
Granted, I only finished watching it about an hour ago, but I've already largely forgotten what went on.
Apparently some alien race showed up and demanded that the world sacrifice 8 million people for some strange reason... something about a disease, that somehow, inexplicably, human "essence" or some shit was the cure... so the main character's daughter gets chosen to be sacrificed by some twisted lottery... (I wonder if people had to buy tickets... cause that would both suck terribly, and be rather hilarious... "look ma! I won... and my prize is... oh damn...")
Anyways, stupidity, and really crappy looking weapons ensue... and so does Carl Weathers, sadly not promoting Burger King, or other fine dining establishments where one is capable of getting free refills on one's drinks...
So, seriously, I was having the damndest time trying to figure out what the weapons they were using were. Looked like AKs with some crazy ass stock, and an M4 carry handle. And a weird barrel/flash-hider... and the aliens used scraps of plexiglass...
Anyways, the good guys use some technology they reverse engineered from the Roswell crash (which naturally are the same aliens as are currently oppressing the world), and blow up some satelite/space station thing, which they just randomly started referring to when they were about to blow it up, and I don't remember them referencing before, so, until they actually blew it up, I hadn't the foggiest clue what they were actually trying to blow up...
I think it was Alien Siege... or something...
Unless that was the one with Bruce Campbell as the doctor guy who ends up saving the world by, well, being Bruce Campbell. Or that might have been Alien Apocalypse... I don't even freaking know anymore... all these shitty Sci-Fi movies blend together into one horrendous amalgamation of stupidity, shit, and.... uh... shit. But they're glorious in that respect.
I also watched Mask of Zorro a while back... or it might be called something else... its the one where Anthony Hopkins is inexplicably hairy and Mexican... and Zorro. Basically, I only watched it because it had Bra'tac in it. And as we all know Bra'tac is awesome... and really hard to type because the apostrophe key is dangerously close to the return key.
Anyways, I've just discovered that I like making new paragraphs for things... I seem to do that alot... whatever...
Anyways some more, I discovered why Zorro is cool. Because he's always so happy when he's stabbificating people... he seems to find great joy in prancing around and stabbing random goons. Whatever floats his boat...
Best line: Original Zorro: "Do you even know how to use that?" (referencing a sword)
Zorro in Training: "Yeah, the pointy end goes into the other guy." *weird face*
And earlier, I discovered why I like Batman. I realize that I have already told this theory to my sole reader, but hey, whatever, now it'll be in print.
He hits people. With people.
Sheer brilliance.
And while I was laying on the couch earlier, I have decided what my autobiography (or biography if I'm too damn lazy to write it) will be called:
"I'm Not Wearing Any Pants: The Al Gore Story"
Behold the power of a little bit of bad sci-fi, a decent amount of GRE studying, and a lot bit of crazy...
Monday, August 18, 2008
Black Swarm
So, I just got done watching "Black Swarm" off the DVR. Its one of those Sci-Fi original movies and that should tell you something...
You remember that Men In Black movie? The one where the bug alien thing takes over the ugly dude, and tries to do something or another? Yeah, that one. Anyways, that's pretty much the plot of this movie. Genetically engineered wasps essentially take over a town, infecting townsfolk who become "drones". Yeah, OK...
Well, I wasn't paying that much attention. Except for the end, where some cargo helicopters carry an impressive amount of missiles and guns. And are referred to as "attack helicopters" by people who are underground, with no windows... Apparently helicopters sound different when they've got weapons. Probably angrier...
So, I'm getting a laptop. That will live on our couch. So I should be updating this blog more often, as I watch more bad sci-fi.
Oh and the main character (a chick) and the other main character (a dude) apparently had some sort of history together (i.e. boning). But then the chick ended up leaving the dude on the altar, and eventually marrying the dude's brother (identical twin, no less), while carrying the dude's unborn kid in her womb.
So, lets have a poll:
That's creepy as hell, right?
Well, not so much a poll, as a question. And sort of a question to see who actually reads this damn thing. I'm gonna go with no one. Except maybe Su... if I tell her that I wrote this...
And random thought from earlier:
I was watching Troy, and the main gates of Troy opened inwards. That seems kinda dumb. Because if the opponent uses a battering ram (which they are quite prone to doing in that sort of movie), they'll be forcing the door open. It seems to me that if the gates opened outwards, the battering ram would force the doors more closed, and be harder to open. And I gotta figure that it'd be pretty hard for an attacking army to get close to the gates, and then pull them open. And thus endeth my thoughts on Castle/Gigantor City Wall design.
You remember that Men In Black movie? The one where the bug alien thing takes over the ugly dude, and tries to do something or another? Yeah, that one. Anyways, that's pretty much the plot of this movie. Genetically engineered wasps essentially take over a town, infecting townsfolk who become "drones". Yeah, OK...
Well, I wasn't paying that much attention. Except for the end, where some cargo helicopters carry an impressive amount of missiles and guns. And are referred to as "attack helicopters" by people who are underground, with no windows... Apparently helicopters sound different when they've got weapons. Probably angrier...
So, I'm getting a laptop. That will live on our couch. So I should be updating this blog more often, as I watch more bad sci-fi.
Oh and the main character (a chick) and the other main character (a dude) apparently had some sort of history together (i.e. boning). But then the chick ended up leaving the dude on the altar, and eventually marrying the dude's brother (identical twin, no less), while carrying the dude's unborn kid in her womb.
So, lets have a poll:
That's creepy as hell, right?
Well, not so much a poll, as a question. And sort of a question to see who actually reads this damn thing. I'm gonna go with no one. Except maybe Su... if I tell her that I wrote this...
And random thought from earlier:
I was watching Troy, and the main gates of Troy opened inwards. That seems kinda dumb. Because if the opponent uses a battering ram (which they are quite prone to doing in that sort of movie), they'll be forcing the door open. It seems to me that if the gates opened outwards, the battering ram would force the doors more closed, and be harder to open. And I gotta figure that it'd be pretty hard for an attacking army to get close to the gates, and then pull them open. And thus endeth my thoughts on Castle/Gigantor City Wall design.
Thursday, October 11, 2007
One more thing
I saw the most amazing bumper sticker today:
I'm only speeding
cause I have to POOP
with a small drawing of a pile of poo...
that is all...
have a good day...
I'm only speeding
cause I have to POOP
with a small drawing of a pile of poo...
that is all...
have a good day...
Well, apparentlly i still have a blog
I haven't updated this thing an ass long time... i'm pretty sure you've noticed that... or maybe you haven't... but then again, if you haven't, you probably aren't reading this right now, because you don't check my blog...
so, i guess i'll just continue then...
anyways, a few weeks, maybe months, back, i watched a couple of bad sci-fi movies... all starring Jonas Quinn...
and now for an aside that will explain my naming conventions. I will not be referring to actors by their given names, but instead by the role I know them best in. For example, Richard Dean Anderson will not be referred to as such, but probably alternating between MacGyver and Han Solo. Anyways, for the purpose of this post, and your information, Jonas Quinn is a character on Stargate SG-1, who replaced Dr. Daniel Jackson when his character died at the end of the 5th season. Quinn is played by Corin Nemec, who apparently has a number of bad sci-fi movies under his belt... and that's the last i'll be explaining of people's names. I'll let you have the fun and excitingness of figuring the rest out for yourselves...
anyways, the first movie that came on was "SS Doomtrooper". How can you resist a movie with that title? Anyways, the premise of the movie was that the Nazis were experimenting with the new and exciting "nuclear radiation", which allowed them to create the titular character, basically a huge muscular glowing guy... and i hope that titular means what i think it means, otherwise, this doomtrooper guy apparently has some serious boob-age issues...
anyways, Jonas Quinn played the role of the Army Dude Who Goes Up Against The SS Doomtrooper Dude, And Through Some Adversity, Manages to Vanquish His Evil Foe. I'm pretty sure that was exactly the character's name in the movie, but I could be wrong... anyways, he had a bunch of buddies that went on the mission who were playing the roles of Random Friends of Army Dude, Who Are Essential For The Success Of The Mission, But Are Inexplicably In Jail At The Time, And Thus Require Army Dude To Convince the Brass To Let them Out of Jail, So They Can Go On This Absurdly Important Mission. If I weren't so lazy, I'd come up with an acronym or something... Instead I'm gonna stick with Jonas Quinn, and the Dirty Dozen (even though there were only about 5 of them)... the plot should seem rather familiar, except without the whole SS Doomtrooper guy...
Anyways, I don't really remember much of the movie, except for the bad computer graphics, and that Jonas Quinn had some bad hair... dude needs a haircut (see later for when I talk about Mansquito)
Anyways, they eventually vanquish the foe, and everyone's happy... except for the general, who gets his Jeep jacked by our intrepid heroes at the end of the movie, because apparently, since they just got back from the mission, they can go futzing around the countryside in an american Jeep, while still wearing German uniforms, and not get shot... or reprimanded by the General whose jeep they just freaking stole...
Mansquito: Well, at the beginning, I was quite surprised, because apparently Jonas Quinn was boning Shaun'auc... Figured Teal'c was gonna show up and kick his ass, but he never did... and then she turned into a mosquito thing... womansquito? who knows...
anyways, the best part of this movie was when Jonas went into the hospital to hunt down the criminal guy who had turned into the mansquito... At one point, Jonas shot the creature with an m203, after yelling "Hey, Mansquito!"... Not very often that they actually use the name of the movie in the movie itself...
And right then and there I decided that if I ever turn into a mansquito or something similar, I would like someone to yell "Hey Mansquito!" and then proceed to shoot me with an m203. There's just a certain flair for the awesome in that death...
And now, that movie with the Tiger and Gary Busey...
I have no idea what it was called, but it was a bad sci-fi movie with Gary Busey... Gary Busey starred as the sheriff of some town suffering from an acute case of tiger...
anyways, for some odd reason, the wardrobe department had the good Mr. Busey dressed up in a really poorly fitting suit, which just looked terrible...
and for some reason, they decided to end the movie in much the same fashion as "Kaw", which was the bad sci-fi movie with Sean Patrick Flannery. Basically, they're in the store thingy, and then they blow up the gas pump to obliterate the creature... except this one didn't have the little epilogue where the main character gets killed randomly by a new flock of crazy ass crows... although, given the choice between Busey, and Flannery deserving random death at the end of the movie, I would totally have chosen Busey... but I guess that's why i'm not writing bad Sci-fi movies...
anyways, the best part of that movie was when the sheriff was giving a press conference, and someone asked what the implications of having a tiger on the loose was. Gary Busey answered something to the effect of "there's a tiger on the loose" and proceed to make a really strange face... it was incredibly odd, and rather funny at the same time... further proof that Gary Busey is insane... and looks really weird...
so, i guess i'll just continue then...
anyways, a few weeks, maybe months, back, i watched a couple of bad sci-fi movies... all starring Jonas Quinn...
and now for an aside that will explain my naming conventions. I will not be referring to actors by their given names, but instead by the role I know them best in. For example, Richard Dean Anderson will not be referred to as such, but probably alternating between MacGyver and Han Solo. Anyways, for the purpose of this post, and your information, Jonas Quinn is a character on Stargate SG-1, who replaced Dr. Daniel Jackson when his character died at the end of the 5th season. Quinn is played by Corin Nemec, who apparently has a number of bad sci-fi movies under his belt... and that's the last i'll be explaining of people's names. I'll let you have the fun and excitingness of figuring the rest out for yourselves...
anyways, the first movie that came on was "SS Doomtrooper". How can you resist a movie with that title? Anyways, the premise of the movie was that the Nazis were experimenting with the new and exciting "nuclear radiation", which allowed them to create the titular character, basically a huge muscular glowing guy... and i hope that titular means what i think it means, otherwise, this doomtrooper guy apparently has some serious boob-age issues...
anyways, Jonas Quinn played the role of the Army Dude Who Goes Up Against The SS Doomtrooper Dude, And Through Some Adversity, Manages to Vanquish His Evil Foe. I'm pretty sure that was exactly the character's name in the movie, but I could be wrong... anyways, he had a bunch of buddies that went on the mission who were playing the roles of Random Friends of Army Dude, Who Are Essential For The Success Of The Mission, But Are Inexplicably In Jail At The Time, And Thus Require Army Dude To Convince the Brass To Let them Out of Jail, So They Can Go On This Absurdly Important Mission. If I weren't so lazy, I'd come up with an acronym or something... Instead I'm gonna stick with Jonas Quinn, and the Dirty Dozen (even though there were only about 5 of them)... the plot should seem rather familiar, except without the whole SS Doomtrooper guy...
Anyways, I don't really remember much of the movie, except for the bad computer graphics, and that Jonas Quinn had some bad hair... dude needs a haircut (see later for when I talk about Mansquito)
Anyways, they eventually vanquish the foe, and everyone's happy... except for the general, who gets his Jeep jacked by our intrepid heroes at the end of the movie, because apparently, since they just got back from the mission, they can go futzing around the countryside in an american Jeep, while still wearing German uniforms, and not get shot... or reprimanded by the General whose jeep they just freaking stole...
Mansquito: Well, at the beginning, I was quite surprised, because apparently Jonas Quinn was boning Shaun'auc... Figured Teal'c was gonna show up and kick his ass, but he never did... and then she turned into a mosquito thing... womansquito? who knows...
anyways, the best part of this movie was when Jonas went into the hospital to hunt down the criminal guy who had turned into the mansquito... At one point, Jonas shot the creature with an m203, after yelling "Hey, Mansquito!"... Not very often that they actually use the name of the movie in the movie itself...
And right then and there I decided that if I ever turn into a mansquito or something similar, I would like someone to yell "Hey Mansquito!" and then proceed to shoot me with an m203. There's just a certain flair for the awesome in that death...
And now, that movie with the Tiger and Gary Busey...
I have no idea what it was called, but it was a bad sci-fi movie with Gary Busey... Gary Busey starred as the sheriff of some town suffering from an acute case of tiger...
anyways, for some odd reason, the wardrobe department had the good Mr. Busey dressed up in a really poorly fitting suit, which just looked terrible...
and for some reason, they decided to end the movie in much the same fashion as "Kaw", which was the bad sci-fi movie with Sean Patrick Flannery. Basically, they're in the store thingy, and then they blow up the gas pump to obliterate the creature... except this one didn't have the little epilogue where the main character gets killed randomly by a new flock of crazy ass crows... although, given the choice between Busey, and Flannery deserving random death at the end of the movie, I would totally have chosen Busey... but I guess that's why i'm not writing bad Sci-fi movies...
anyways, the best part of that movie was when the sheriff was giving a press conference, and someone asked what the implications of having a tiger on the loose was. Gary Busey answered something to the effect of "there's a tiger on the loose" and proceed to make a really strange face... it was incredibly odd, and rather funny at the same time... further proof that Gary Busey is insane... and looks really weird...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
